Any DVD writer will be fine. I have a Pioneer 16x model which I've been very pleased with - does all formats, is very fast, and doesn't use much processor power.
Some older TV DVD players may be a bit particular about different makes or types (DVD+R or DVD-R) of media. So long as your DVD writer accepts whatever your DVD player likes, it'll be fine. These days pretty much everything works but that wasn't always the case.
As far as software goes, I'm pretty pleased with Nero which can do pretty much anything you need with DVDs and video files.