HOME | MAIN BOARD | JIM'S BLOG | LOGIN | REGISTER | SEARCH | FLAT MODE

not logged in

re: Dressed in the Dark and Some Random Rambling

Posted by:
Vin 07:44 am MST 02/15/07
In reply to: re: Dressed in the Dark - The_Count 09:37 am MST 02/14/07

Glad you liked it, Count. Thanks for the kind words. My favorite Jim parody that I've written (out of 3 or 4, not a huge number) is "Breed'em Like Sheep," which was written at the height of the "Dolly the Sheep" cloning break-through in Scotland, back in '96 or '97, I guess, and is all about cloning Jim so he can be more prolific. Its another one that I'll have to try to find or re-create at some point.

Honestly I'm pretty amazed by the brain's capacity to remember doggerel verse written years ago, and other such trivial minutiae, and yet forget all kinds of useful things.

For example, on the train this morning I saw a picture of some militants wearing goofy berets in the newspaper, which got me thinking about how two of my favorite G.I. Joe action figures wore berets, Flint and Lt. Falcon. What popped into my head next, you ask? Why, the "real" names of those G.I. Joe guys, Dashiel R. Fairborne and Vincent R. Falcone, respectively. For good measure, I thought of the non-beret wearing G.I. Joe Duke, whose real name was Conrad S. Hauser. Now I ask you, shouldn't that sort of useless information have been wiped from my brain 15 years ago?

Fuck, I'm not sure I can remember how to do long division by hand these days, but THIS I can remember without even trying???? Weird.

> Vin,
> Thank you for re-posting this. I am laughing out loud as
> hard as I did the first time around. This is sheer
> brilliance. (I was the one who mentioned this a few months
> ago.)
> Maybe we could get more parodies submitted from the other
> members? I may even give it a try myself. I don't think
> Jim would mind. He has a a deliciously twisted sense of
> humor himself.
> Oh, and to display my ongoing descent into fossilhood,
> what was the other parody that triggered my memory of this
> one? We should collect these in a safe (ie: nothing to do
> with me) place.
> The Count
>
> > Somebody mentioned these parody lyrics a couple of months
> > ago. I couldn't find the original so I recreated it, its
> > mostly the same, with a few forgotten lines re-written.
> >
> > Enjoy or try dying!
> >
> >
> >
> > Dressed in the Dark
> >
> > What are you wearing? And why is it purple? And have you
> > really been shopping again? That necktie is awful; is
> > that houndís tooth AND stripes? And will these damn
> > fashion crimes never end? How wrong is that jacket? And
> > why is it cropped? Is that shirt really orange and blue?
> > Where did you get that, and can you please take it back?
> > And Lord what is up with those shoes?
> >
> >
> > You don't have to tell me I look bad
> > it couldn't be any clearer
> > I know what you were thinking when you saw me last night
> > "For God's sake does that boy own a mirror?"
> >
> > I did the best I could do
> > but its just never enough
> > I tried to look good so badly tonight
> > but matching outfits up is always so tough
> >
> > I should have known that it was coming to this
> > God damn I'm so color blind
> > I'm wearing ruby red pants with orange argyle socks
> > people must think that I'm out of my mind
> >
> > I started getting dressed at 12:25
> > now its a quarter to three
> > and when you called me up and said you had a kitten to
> > feed
> > I knew that cat had better taste than me
> >
> > Yeah, as soon as you said you had a kitten to feed
> > I knew that cat had better taste than me.
> >
> > I know you don't love me
> > I know there's no way you could
> > I'm not even asking for you to be nice
> > but I got some questions to ask you
> > so please give me a call
> > I could really use some advice
> >
> > And there are so many things that I just gotta know
> > can I match blue with dark magenta! brown and red!?
> > And after Labor Day, is it really not okay to wear white?
> >
> > I just gotta know so it don't look as though
> > I went and dressed in the dark again.
> > I just gotta know so it don't look as though
> > I went and dressed in the dark again
> >
> > I should have known that it was coming to this!
> > Why must I be color blind??
> > I've got this Scottish plaid vest and these tight yellow
> > jeans
> > but a matching shirt is so hard to find!
> >
> > Should I go Goth and then I'd only wear black?
> > Or UPS and wear brown?
> > But there's eleven million different shades of green in
> > this world
> > and I'm in Hell when I go out on the town
> > a lonely Hell when I go out on the town
> >
> > But down in my soul, down in my soul I know!
> >
> > I know you can help me
> > -oh how I prayed that you would-
> > with mixing and matching and accessories
> > you know I'm emerald green with envy
> > of your fashion sense
> > I know that you look so good with ease
> >
> > And there are so many things that I just gotta know
> > like is there a difference between khaki and tan?
> > And do people really care if I wear corduroy in July?
> >
> > I just gotta know so it don't look as though
> > I went and dressed in the dark again
> > I just gotta know so people don't go
> > "Hey look, he dressed in the dark again"
> > I just gotta know so nobody goes
> > "That fucker dressed in the dark again"
> > I just gotta know so it don't look as though
> > I went and dressed in the dark again.
> >
> > Dressed in the dark again
> >
> > Did you look at this stuff before you paid legal tender?
> > Did you buy off the rack? Did they cut you a deal? Was
> > it more than half-off? Did you get it on-line? Did you
> > fall for some cute sales girl's spiel? Were your eyes
> > even open? Was it too hard to look? Or were you just
> > smoking crack after all? What is that you're wearing and
> > if you are smoking crack, can we please give your dealer a
> > call??? 'Cause I think I may puke on those shoes. I
> > really might puke on those shoes. It might help if I
> > puked on those shoes...
> >
> >


reply |

Previous: re: Dressed in the Dark - The_Count 09:37 am MST 02/14/07
Next: re: Dressed in the Dark and Some Random Rambling - The_Count 08:32 am MST 02/15/07

Thread:



HOME | MAIN BOARD | JIM'S BLOG | LOG OFF | START A NEW THREAD | EDIT PROFILE | SEARCH | FLAT MODE