To the Chairman:
At last! In Jim Steinman Amherst finally has its very own pornographic priest, its priapic prophet of the ultimate, absolute, mind-zapping gory raunch.
This time it is The Doors, and Jim Morrison of the leather (ooh!) codpiece, who are the lucky beneficiaries of Steinman's panegyric. Fellatio in pantomime! Think of it, my fellow Amherst men, as the very farthest-out reward for Jim's artistic search to date, and isn't it a pity that MACE had to spoil it all.
But do not falter, Jim baby. It should have occurred to us sooner that the final solution to everything that is wrong with this would is the oozy onanistic fantasy, the more frequent and bloodier the better, and who cares if it's art?
Donald O. White
Associate Professor of German
Source: Amherst Student archives