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| re: List The Things You Would Believe If JIM Told You Himself | |
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tealcyfre (tealcyfre@mac.com) 06:01 am UTC 05/26/07 |
| In reply to: | List The Things You Would Believe If JIM Told You Himself - pidunk 05:37 am UTC 05/26/07 |
| 1) The Brooklyn Bridge is available for sale, and would be a hell of an investment. 2) Andrew Lloyd Webber is a composer. 3) The New York Yankees are a baseball team. 4) Penguins are actually agents of the Transdimensional Thought Police. 5) Penguins are not actually agents of the Transdimensional Thought Police. 6) The Transdimensional Thought Police told Jim to say that. 7) The Cheese Stands Alone. 8) Brie is an act of God. 9) Beethoven was God, but Richard Wagner was a pretty fair stand-in, of a sort, in his better moments. 10) Two rights rarely make a left. 11) George Bush is a hell of a President (Okay, I wouldn't *really* believe that one if he said that, and he wouldn't say that, but if he did I'd try to believe – and fail.) 12) This board is actually a secret weapon – of whom or what, no one is quite certain. 13) Gold is a certain investment. 14) Platinum is a bit more uncertain. 15) Nickel... –not going there, ask Jim Rogers. 16) God's favorite color is no color you've ever seen. 17) There is no God. 18) There is a God, but she's Lost. 19) Orpheus never looked back. 20) What's in the rear view mirror doesn't matter. 21) The speed of light is very, very fast – unless you're light, in which case it's perfectly normal. 22) The Devil's favorite color is God. 23) God is not the Devil's favorite entity. 24) Fallen Angels can't get up. 25) Fallen Angels can get up, but if they do you *really* don't want to fuck around with them. 26) In the Children's Story of the Tortoise and the Hare the hare actually wins, because he's so damn fast that he knew he could take a break and still win, but the Tortoise v e r y s l o w l y wrote the story, and guess who wins in the Tortoise's version. 27) Hillary Rodham Clinton may or may not swallow but you don't want to know. 28) The Earth really *is* the center of the Universe, it's just that if you want to work out your calculations on that basis they are *Really Very Complicated* and so we prefer the assumption that, no, it's not. 29) Penguins represent Dolphin interests in this dimension. 30) Dolphin's represent the White Mice' interests in this dimension. 31) This dimension is a compelling argument in favor of other dimensions. 32) The Cheese Stands Alone (Worth Repeating) NB: These are things I would believe if Jim said them. Transubstantiation as other than metaphor, however, is flat OUT. Al | |
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