HOME | MAIN BOARD | JIM'S BLOG | LOGIN | REGISTER | SEARCH | FLAT MODE

not logged in

Dressed in the Dark

Posted by:
Vin 06:14 am MST 02/14/07

Somebody mentioned these parody lyrics a couple of months ago. I couldn't find the original so I recreated it, its mostly the same, with a few forgotten lines re-written.

Enjoy or try dying!



Dressed in the Dark

What are you wearing? And why is it purple? And have you really been shopping again? That necktie is awful; is that houndís tooth AND stripes? And will these damn fashion crimes never end? How wrong is that jacket? And why is it cropped? Is that shirt really orange and blue? Where did you get that, and can you please take it back? And Lord what is up with those shoes?


You don't have to tell me I look bad
it couldn't be any clearer
I know what you were thinking when you saw me last night
"For God's sake does that boy own a mirror?"

I did the best I could do
but its just never enough
I tried to look good so badly tonight
but matching outfits up is always so tough

I should have known that it was coming to this
God damn I'm so color blind
I'm wearing ruby red pants with orange argyle socks
people must think that I'm out of my mind

I started getting dressed at 12:25
now its a quarter to three
and when you called me up and said you had a kitten to feed
I knew that cat had better taste than me

Yeah, as soon as you said you had a kitten to feed
I knew that cat had better taste than me.

I know you don't love me
I know there's no way you could
I'm not even asking for you to be nice
but I got some questions to ask you
so please give me a call
I could really use some advice

And there are so many things that I just gotta know
can I match blue with dark magenta! brown and red!?
And after Labor Day, is it really not okay to wear white?

I just gotta know so it don't look as though
I went and dressed in the dark again.
I just gotta know so it don't look as though
I went and dressed in the dark again

I should have known that it was coming to this!
Why must I be color blind??
I've got this Scottish plaid vest and these tight yellow jeans
but a matching shirt is so hard to find!

Should I go Goth and then I'd only wear black?
Or UPS and wear brown?
But there's eleven million different shades of green in this world
and I'm in Hell when I go out on the town
a lonely Hell when I go out on the town

But down in my soul, down in my soul I know!

I know you can help me
-oh how I prayed that you would-
with mixing and matching and accessories
you know I'm emerald green with envy
of your fashion sense
I know that you look so good with ease

And there are so many things that I just gotta know
like is there a difference between khaki and tan?
And do people really care if I wear corduroy in July?

I just gotta know so it don't look as though
I went and dressed in the dark again
I just gotta know so people don't go
"Hey look, he dressed in the dark again"
I just gotta know so nobody goes
"That fucker dressed in the dark again"
I just gotta know so it don't look as though
I went and dressed in the dark again.

Dressed in the dark again

Did you look at this stuff before you paid legal tender? Did you buy off the rack? Did they cut you a deal? Was it more than half-off? Did you get it on-line? Did you fall for some cute sales girl's spiel? Were your eyes even open? Was it too hard to look? Or were you just smoking crack after all? What is that you're wearing and if you are smoking crack, can we please give your dealer a call??? 'Cause I think I may puke on those shoes. I really might puke on those shoes. It might help if I puked on those shoes...




reply |

Previous: re: OOPS! - Laci 11:32 pm MST 02/14/07
Next: re: Dressed in the Dark - The_Count 09:37 am MST 02/14/07

Thread:



HOME | MAIN BOARD | JIM'S BLOG | LOG OFF | START A NEW THREAD | EDIT PROFILE | SEARCH | FLAT MODE